in some way or another, it isn't their fault that i was feeling that way. kaya nga ako na lang ang umiwas eh. been trying to avoid such things para naman kahit papano eh mabawasan yung pag-iyak ko sa gabi. i also allow myself to focus on some things para mawalan ako ng time sa pag-iisip ng mga ganyang bagay.
nakakainis lang kasi kahit naman wala silang ginagawa eh nasasaktan ka pa din. haaay. praning no? adik lang. for quite some time, nagtatanong din ako why i have to be so emotional? bakit kasi hindi na lang ako yung tao na balewala ang lahat ng nasa paligid ko? yung tipong, the hell i care with what you do as long as it doesn't involve me. kaso hindi nga ganun eh. i've been hurt and still hurting for the same old reason. him. and her. kinda nakakasawa, parang naka-hang lang kasi ako, not knowing what to do.. but in fact i know what i should do, and that is to accept that they are happy and that happiness doesn't include me.
well, that's life. life happens and it happens to be unfair. accept and move on. that's what someone told me. but it's hard. they should know that too.
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